When Your Ex Becomes a Threat: Home Security Tips for Dealing With an Ex Partner | By Jordan Frankel

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Breaking up is never easy, but when an ex-partner refuses to move on and begins engaging in harassing or threatening behavior, the situation can escalate into something dangerous. If you’re dealing with a threatening former partner, implementing home security tips for dealing with an ex can help protect your safety and restore peace of mind. From changing locks to installing advanced security systems, there are practical steps you can take to secure your home and keep yourself safe.

Why Home Security Matters After a Breakup

For some individuals, a breakup fuels feelings of betrayal, jealousy, or anger. These emotions can drive an ex-partner to engage in destructive behaviors such as harassment, illegal trespassing, stalking, or even violence. Unfortunately, these scenarios often lead to tragic outcomes.

For example, a Click On Detroit report highlighted a case in Mount Clemens, Michigan, where a young woman’s ex-boyfriend broke into her home and fatally shot her boyfriend. In another case reported by the New York Times, a woman in Queens was stabbed to death in her workplace by her estranged husband, who had been harassing her for years before the attack.

These examples underscore the importance of proactive security measures. If you’re dealing with a similar situation, these home security tips for dealing with an ex can help you protect your home, your safety, and your peace of mind.

Essential Home Security Tips for Dealing with an Ex

1. Replace Your Locks Immediately

If you’re still living in the residence you once shared with your ex, one of the first steps you should take is to replace all locks on your entry doors. Even if your ex returned their key, you cannot be sure they didn’t make a copy.

Avoid hiding spare keys outside, as this makes it easy for your ex to gain access. If you share children with your ex, ensure your children don’t have keys they can accidentally share with your former partner.

2. Reinforce Doors and Windows

Locked doors and windows are often not enough to deter a determined ex-partner. Enhancing these vulnerable entry points is crucial.

  • Install Heavy-Duty Deadbolts: These add an extra layer of protection and make it harder for someone to force entry.
  • Use a Security Door Brace: Devices like the OnGARD Security Door Brace can withstand up to 1,775 pounds of force, making it nearly impossible to break down a door. To see the OnGARD in action, watch this video demonstration.
  • Apply Glass Protection Film: Products such as BurglarGARD glass security film provide an invisible barrier that strengthens windows and sliding glass doors against breakage. This additional protection can buy you valuable time to call for help.

3. Install a Comprehensive Home Security System

A robust home security system can be an effective way to deter intruders and alert you to potential threats. Here’s what to look for:

  • Alarm System with a Panic Button: This allows you to instantly notify the monitoring company of an intruder, ensuring a swift response.
  • Surveillance Cameras: Opt for a wireless system with multiple cameras, night vision, and recording capabilities. These systems can alert you when someone enters your property and provide evidence in case of an incident.
  • Portable LCD Monitor: A portable monitor lets you view camera footage from anywhere in your home, giving you time to call for help if necessary.

4. Upgrade Outdoor Lighting

Adequate lighting is a simple yet effective deterrent against intruders. Motion-activated lights around entry points and walkways make it difficult for anyone to approach unnoticed.

5. Stay Vigilant When Away from Home

Your home isn’t the only place where your ex might try to approach or threaten you. Always remain alert and aware of your surroundings:

  • Look for signs you’re being followed when leaving your house.
  • Avoid isolated areas and park in well-lit spaces when running errands.
  • If possible, have a friend or family member accompany you when shopping or traveling.

6. Notify Your Workplace

If your ex is harassing you at work, inform your supervisor or human resources department. They can take steps to enhance workplace security, such as restricting access to unauthorized individuals or arranging for an escort to your vehicle after hours.

7. Obtain a Restraining Order

A restraining order can serve as an additional layer of protection by legally prohibiting your ex from contacting you or coming near your home or workplace. While it doesn’t physically prevent them from approaching, it gives law enforcement the authority to arrest your ex if they violate the order.

8. Document All Harassment

Building a case against your ex requires thorough documentation. Keep records of:

  • Threatening texts, emails, or social media messages.
  • Instances where your ex appeared near your home or workplace.
  • Police reports filed for each incident.

This evidence is critical for obtaining a restraining order or pursuing further legal action.

Protect Yourself with a Safety-First Mentality

Even during times when your ex seems to be behaving appropriately, never let your guard down. Maintaining a safety-first mentality is essential for your protection.

  • Change Routines: Avoid predictable patterns that your ex can track, such as leaving or arriving home at the same time every day.
  • Limit Information Sharing: Be cautious about what you share with mutual friends or on social media.
  • Stay Connected: Keep a trusted friend or family member informed of your whereabouts, especially if you feel unsafe.

Don’t Let an Ex-Partner Control Your Life

The best way to protect yourself from an ex-partner’s uncontrollable behavior is to take control of your safety. By implementing these home security tips for dealing with an ex, you can create a secure environment and regain your peace of mind.

If you’re facing threats or harassment from a former partner, don’t wait for the situation to escalate. Start taking steps today to protect yourself and your loved ones.

Click here for more street-smart security tips by home security expert Jordan Frankel.